Silver
by obsessedwithstabler
Summary: Is it possible to hate a piece of paper? Angsty Kathy centered story.


Just a little something from Kathy's POV. It's strange, but I'm getting more and more comfortable in her shoes. Weird, huh? LOL. Well, enjoy, and please remember to leave me a little review!

Disclaimer: Not mine!

SVUSVUSVUSVUSVU

Is it possible to hate a piece of paper?

Just a simple piece of paper, but as Kathy stared at it, she was starting to realize that it was her worst fear come true.

The first time she had seen Elliot, she had known that she was going to marry him. He had the most beautiful eyes that she had ever seen, and from the moment she looked into them, her heart was gone. And barely two years later, they had a beautiful daughter and she was already pregnant for the second time. At the beginning, it was hard, but it was all she had ever wanted. Sure, it was a little faster than she had planned in her life. But from the day she met Elliot, she believed that she had been intended for him.

But after the twins were born, things started to crumble. He was working hard hours, and when he was home, he just wanted to sleep. Still she pushed on, fighting to hold together the life that they had built. The children were growing fast, and just being around them made her smile. But the smile faded over time.

Then he was partnered with Olivia Benson.

Before her, he had never had a female partner, and part of her hoped that she wouldn't last. His last partner had been killed, and he had a bad habit of running each new partner off. But when he came home that first night, she could tell something was different. His eyes weren't as haunted as they had been for months, and his smile was as bright as it had been the day they had met.

She hadn't wanted to admit it to herself then, but she knew that their floundering marriage was going to be put to the ultimate test.

At first, it was tolerable. He came home at reasonable hours, and while he was tired, he still had plenty of energy to spend time with the kids and help her around the house. Then slowly he started staying later and later, and every time she confronted him, he shrugged it off as though it was no big deal. No big deal? He was spending more time with his partner than at home where he belonged, and it was no big deal?

Then there was a shootout, and everything was put into perspective again when Captain Cragen called her at home. She was the wife of a cop, and she knew that at any time, there could be a call telling her that her husband was dead.

And sometimes, she almost wished that that was the case.

She wasn't a hateful woman, but she was tired. She was tired of having a husband who was never home, and she was tired of living with the ghost of their former life. Their kids were growing up fast, yet she was stuck right where she was. Divorce crossed her mind countless times, but divorce was a sin.

Sin.

So she put it aside, along with her own happiness and her faltering willpower, and she didn't think about it again until she found out that he had been shot again. Again she raced to the hospital, and again she was reminded of everything that was wrong, but right, in their relationship. It could be fixed. She would make it work.

That thought stayed with her until she walked into Elliot's room. Then her whole world came crashing down around her.

Olivia was sitting on the bed with him, with virtually no space between them as she leaned over and touched her forehead to his. To an unbiased bystander, this act could have been seen as a completely innocent and reassuring gesture.

Kathy saw the end of her marriage.

Before either of them could notice her, she slipped back out of the room. That night, she went home and called her lawyer to have the divorce papers drawn up. They would figure out visitation later. After explaining to the kids that they were going on a little trip, she packed up clothes for them, then called her mother. Within two hours, the house stood completely empty and silent.

That was five years, two reconciliations, and a lifetime ago.

She didn't even know why that piece of paper upset her so much. Even if it meant that they went their separate ways, she still wanted him to be happy. He was the father of her beautiful children. And he had moved on, just like she had wanted him to. So why couldn't she stop staring at that paper that lay on the table in front of her?

"Mom?"

The voice of her youngest daughter snapped her out of her thoughts, and Kathy smiled at her. "Yeah, sweetheart?"

Elizabeth laid her head on her mother's shoulder. "Are you gonna go?"

That was not the question that had been plaguing her mind since she had opened the mailbox, but it should have been. "I don't know."

"I think Daddy wants me to go."

The older woman chewed on her lip. "Well, sweetheart, that's up to you. If you want to go, then go." She saw the look in her daughter's crisp blue eyes, and she reached out, running her hand through hair that was so much like her own. "But I do think that she would like it if you went."

"Are you sure...?"

"Absolutely." She kissed Elizabeth's forehead. "Now go do your homework. I'll even order pizza for dinner."

Elizabeth's eyes lit up. "With the cheesy crust?"

"Of course."

The young girl grinned and took off up the stairs, leaving Kathy alone once again.

Slowly she stood up, casting another glance at the paper invitation before she grabbed the phone and dialed a number that was taped to the refrigerator.

"Hey, it's me. I just wanted... I just wanted to say... that I'll be there this weekend. Yeah, and I'll bring Elizabeth and Richard. I'll talk to Maureen and Kathleen. Yeah..."

She came back to the table and looked down at the invitation, and suddenly it didn't hurt as bad as it had.

Elliot Stabler and Olivia Benson request the honor of your presence at their wedding ceremony on Saturday, November fifteenth.

The End

A/N: Well, there we go. I do enjoy making her come off as a bit of a bitch now and then, but I can make her a normal person. LOL. Thanks for reading, everyone, and please review!


End file.
